Ten Tips for Laparoscopic Endometriosis Surgery

 This is not a fun surgery, but it’s definitely not the worst (or so they tell me I’ve only had the one), and if you prepare beforehand, it’ll be that much easier. Here are my ten tips for making your surgery experience the best it can be:

1. Get a buddy – A spouse, a partner, a best friend, your mom, a sibling, it doesn’t matter who, but you’re going to need someone, and not just to drive you back and forth. The first night, my fiancé had to literally pick me up out of bed every time I needed to pee. My abdominal muscles just couldn’t do it. In the following days, hopped up on oxycodone and still in pain, I needed him to help me dress the bandages, change my clothes, bring me food, etc. Every body responds to surgery differently, but it’s still better to have a trusted helper for at least a day or two.
2. Where a comfy dress to your surgery – Though I repeatedly read that I should wear loose pants or drawstring shorts, I decided on a sundress, and I’m so glad I did. My abdomen was so bloated that my clothes didn’t fit for a few days. I looked months pregnant. My fiance’s gym shorts were even too tight. It was nuts…and so uncomfortable!
3. Buy new undies – Along the same lines, your regular underwear aren’t going to fit. The hospital gave me a super high-waisted mesh pair, but even so, you’re going to want something big and high for the coming weeks because your incisions are likely going to fall at about your panty line, and you don’t want the waistband constantly rubbing your stitches. And remember, you’ll probably be a bloated balloon for a while too. Size up!
4. You won’t be able to pee, but you’ll bleed – No one warned me that I wouldn’t be able to pee afterward. They put a catheter in during surgery, and apparently it takes a while for the plumbing to restart after that. For the first couple of hours, my bladder was painfully full, but I couldn’t go. A nurse assured me that this was normal, but still, I’d have liked to know ahead of time. Also, you’ll bleed and spot for hours or days, depending. Hospital pads are huge and bulky, so you might want to bring your own.
5. Get a heating pad for your shoulder – When doing laparoscopic surgery, the surgeons have to inflate your abdomen to see what’s going on, so they pump it full of gas, and it’s impossible to remove all of it. The gas travels up and creates intense shoulder pain. Everyone told me it’d be worse than the incision pain, and I didn’t believe it, but goodness gracious, it was the worst. Pain meds don’t help, but moving and heat does, so get yourself a good heating pad, or microwave a sock full of rice. You’re going to need it.
6. Take your meds or you’ll get behind – I’m not one to promote highly addictive pain meds, but don’t be a hero, take them. I was dumb and thought I could handle it at first, but I couldn’t and then I was so far behind that it took hours and hours to get the pain down. Take your meds as scheduled the first couple of days and then slowly wean yourself off.
7. Walk, walk, walk – Getting up is painful, but walking is glorious. It helps with that pesky pain in your shoulder, and it just made me feel better overall. As soon as you feel strong enough, get up and walk, and then keep doing it often.
8. Appreciate the pillow – Have a small pillow with you at the hospital, so you can put it between your sore belly and the seatbelt on the ride home. I used a rolled up towel, which also worked. Anything to keep the seatbelt off of your incisions. A small pillow also comes in handy when you’re trying to sit up. Hold it to your abdomen to brace your muscles, and it’ll hurt less.
9. Listen to yourself and your body – If you think something is wrong, call someone. Better to be safe. My discharge nurse never told me that I could remove the bandages, so for 10 days, I had band-aids covering my four incisions. I have very sensitive skin and ended up with wicked rashes and sores from the adhesive. When I went to get the stitches out, my doctor was shocked. I was supposed to have left them uncovered after day three! He said, “You should have called. If something doesn’t make sense or is hurting you, always call me.”
10. Don’t rush it – I was told that I could go to work after one week and that I should be back to normal after two, but it took me almost four to feel fully 100%. I napped constantly, was dizzy for nearly two weeks, and was in a general state of malaise for most of the month (I was just diagnosed with a chronic illness after all). And that’s okay. Everyone is different, but I read lots of accounts of other women online who were also exhausted and sore and dizzy for weeks longer than their doctors said. Once I read that, I stopped pushing myself. I embraced the nap and slept-in each morning, and before long, I felt remarkably better. Listen to your body, and give it sleep!